Catch up day!

So… once again I’m a bad blogger. I missed as many days as I blogged on this 30 day challenge. So lets catch up on some things.

I was supposed to blog about my family… I’m sorry but I’m going to skip this one because I don’t want to put their business out there.

So I was supposed to blog about my opinion of my body and how comfortable I am in it…

I’m gonna be honest here. Not my favorite topic, I basically hate my body, and I am very awkward and fidgety. I am very conscious about my body, but I live in a very unhealthy environment in every way possible. When I look at my high school pics  I can’t believe how thin I look because I NEVER thought I was that thin. I have this horrible dilemma. My whole family is overweight, and I don’t think anyone is more aware of it than me. My mama, lover her to death but chocolate is NOT the answer to everything, but low and behold she’s always there with a tasty treat for everyone, no matter who it is that  needs a little love. My father who a year ago would eat 2 sandwiches as a between meal snack, is now barely eating because he has a warped sense of food, and how glucose levels function. My sister packs more in her lunch for work than I eat all day. Then she  joins a weight loss competition at work and drops 10 pounds in 1 week. WTF? People always comment how I hardly ever eat, well let me tell you, every little calorie that I eat STICKS. No matter what. And that’s probably because for the majority of HS I messed up a lot of things about myself. Who knows. But I’ve never EVER been comfortable with  myself. I have hated Christmas since I was 3, because I hated people staring at me as I opened presents. I hated being so conscious about every part of me and what people would see, and how I should sit, stand, and expression on my face… do you have any idea what it’s like to be conscious of every muscle in your face and what it looks like to others?

The next blog I missed was what am I wearing today… lets see, black pants and a green t-shirt. Sexy I know.

Does my zodiac fit my personality? Well… I’m a scorpio… I’m gonna say yes. Look that up for yourself.

Something you always think ‘what it’ about

I’m not a what-ifer. I’m a hey, lets move forward thinker. I think WHAT IF about is in preparation of things. I’m big on prep… I plan a lot of events with scouts. I plan camp, what if the kids get bored. What if the kids don’t like this activity, what if it’s too easy, what if it’s too hard…

Something you are proud of: I’m proud of my scouts, those that have grown up, graduated and gone off to bigger things. Those who actually do things. Like Hannah, who spent a semester in Africa. Who used her brain to bring back dirt from a country where she couldn’t collect if off the ground. She’s going to change the world. My scout who is getting ready to graduate, went from a quiet 5 year old, to a boisterous middle schooler to a down right ANNOYING 9^th grader. And now she’s a go-getter, a leader, a facilitator. And she has brass ones. So that’s what I’m proud of. These girls blossoming into amazing women.  

Day 9/10-lets meld days!

oops, mondays are going to by my hardest day to blog, since i put everything in to scouts that day.

So i missed yesturday's mission. Which was:

How important do you think education is?

Well do you want the short answer or the long answer?

Short answer: i think education is the single most important resource we have.

Long answer: I think that most of the problems we face in this country revolve around education. I feel that some people lose out on an education because of their health. We don't promote healthyness in this country. We talk about weightloss, and eating veggies and ruining cookie monster for future generations of kids. We talk about pills and medications, and stuff. But what we DONT do is whole body wellness. Mental health is important. Example:

Well if i'm broke, i have chronic asthma, not to mention the $200 a month that i can't afford for the medications to maintain my asthma.  i can't get a job in this economy, its my last semester of college and i have to think about student loans to pay back, i have to figure out if i can afford gas for the rest of the semester to get to school, to graduate, i can't stand being at home because of the above average level of craziness that is going on there, and we can't AFFORD healthy foods and i'm splitting a pack of ramen with my sister for dinner... and all i can think about during class is how thirsty i am and can't stop coughing. and if i can scrounge up the ludacris $1.50 for a soda out of the bottom of my bookbag.... how much learning is really going on? I'll help you out there: NONE. and just to help you guys out... this is what's ACTUALLY going on in my head this very minute along with several other things, like my take home test which is for philosphy that might as well have been written in chinese... oh wait IT IS!!!!! I don't speak a lick of chinese either. oh, except we do have more than ramen noodles, but only because my mother is buying the food and not me

I think that education is the greatest thing we can pass on to our children, and to others. however we are clearly dividing this country in half with those that can afford an education, and those that can't.

and i dont mean college. I went to a middle school where i was held back in math because my 5th grade teacher thought i was anti-social and couldn't handle REAL math. Guess what... i wasn't anti-social, i thought that kids in my class were imature idiots. I was never able to catch up in math. my 12th grade year i took 2 extra math classes to get to the level my sister was in, and she was in the 8th grade. My HS advisor wouldn't let my take the SATs, because i wasn't college material... What does that even mean? I'm 28 and just now reaching the level i should have been at when i was 22. Why? because the school system held me back, and i was never able to catch up. Was i capable? yes! They took my out of GT classes to put my in inclusion because i needed to make friends... ok... take me out of the class with all my friends since KINDERGARTEN and put me with strangers... that will do it.

i live in baltimore, and was FORTUNATE enough to go to county schools, but if i lived 5 houses to the left i would have had to go to Baltimore City schools. Guess what... WORST school system in the country. so bad that oprah considered bailing them out financially. Why is it the worst? generations of people not properly educated in common sense pass on their ignorance to others who are then left in charge to lead the masses.

I feel like we are seeing echo's of this in our current political climate. i feel like screaming at the major political parties saying LOOK YOU IDIOTS.... YOU BOTH GOT US IN THIS MESS BECAUSE YOU ARE REPEATING THE SAME MISTAKES OVER AND OVER! obviously they didn't learn from them yet...

so look children: pay attention in history class, learn what events lead to the great depression, world war 2, and look at what we are doing now, do they seem to echo?



i could rant some more... but i'll move on to music
day 10: put your ipod on shuffle and list the 1st 10 songs

I did this with great joy. I haven't found anyone with as diverse a taste in music as me... so maybe this list will give you a taste of who i am.
and i promise i didn't edit this, it's really what came up.
1: Changes by david bowie
2: Rubber ducky by Ernie from Sesame Street
3: Chemical party by gavin degraw
4: everytime we touch by cascada
5: you make me feel so young by frank sinatra
6: thats why god made mexico-tim mcgraw
7: Never again-kelly clarkson
8: 1985-bowling for soup
9: i just died in your arms - cutting crew
10: right round -flo rida


so what's playing on your ipod today?

Day-8 What i ate today

omg... its the weekend, a nice relaxing weekend of convenience...
and i dont usually eat breakfast... more like i dont eat breakfast foods, and then i skip lunch...

today i ate:
 lunch: mac and cheese (with bacon and horsradish ala Rachael Ray)
 dinner: homemade mushroom/bacon cheeseburger, with macaroni salad and deviled eggs
snack: mom brought home some scooter pies... never heard of them... so i tried it. not so much a fan...

i did drink alot of juice as i'm battling a kidney stone... fun...

Day 7-pet peeves

1: hairbrushes/hats/ etc on dining room tables or in the kitchen

2: people who don't have the guts to tell the truth especially when it's a pointless lie

3: poor customer service.... It's a job designed for service the customer.... Serve

4: people who are too busy interrupting by asking what's going on, to look around and see what's going on

5: politics.