stormy night...

so theres non-stop thunder outside...
my computer keeps freezing every time i see a huge flash of light
and it looks like a strobe light is sitting outside my window


so i decided my last blog sounded a little harsh. I'd like to point out i combined my feelings for 6 different people into a rant, and i dont think that can be distinguished,  although no one reads this blog so its not that bad. But i do mean every word i said.

so today i was told to QUIT scouts.
so heres the deal

we need to do some work on the house, i'm a grown adult, willing and capable of helping. actually more capable than my parents. my father wants to take a day off work to put up some vinyl siding. he wants help.
he wants me to help him with this. Thats cool. really.

well FRIDAY i have school AND a girl scout sleepover. I dont have them too often but it's the back to school one to get the year jump started.

MONDAY i have my first meetings. They run from 4-5:30 and 7-8:30. add clean up and set up i'm there from a minimum of 3-9. So add in the fact that my classroom has flooded 3 times this summer and hasn't been completely put back together yet, and i'll be there all day. either way i have to be ready to be there by 3, which means i need time to get my act together and get there.

so he tells me i need to give something up. because i never have time to handle my responsibilities in the house hold. he wants me to quit scouts.

normally i'd agree with this logic. EXCEPT THAT.


HE HAD 13 YEARS TO BE WORKING ON THIS SIDING

who's side are you on?

also, my shower has been broken for the last 13 years also. you can't take a SHOWER. you can wash yourself off with a shower hose though. well the shower hose broke and we need to replace a piece of piping in the wall. instead of allowing it to be fixed, my mother suggested me to wash my hair outside with the garden hose. oh no.. dont' worry, she'll hook it up to the sink so i get warm water!


i put 20-25 hours into school each week. i NEED to be putting 40-60, but my parents won't allow that. gee, i wonder why i'm FAILING everything.

i put in at least 2 hours hard core doing stuff for the house a DAY

i put in maybe 5-10 hours into scouts a week, INCLUDING meetings, and depending on whats going on
keep in mind, i'm the leader of one troop, assistant to another, cookie manager for both, and responsible for paperwork for both.

i DONT have a job because i can't get hired anywhere. I try, i put in several hours a week filling out applications.

i spend 4 hours a day driving to and from school.

i cook dinner almost every night. if i'm not there to cook 'family' dinner then i'm on my own, so i cook SOMETHING every night.

i am the only one in the house who cleans

i'm the designated taxi driver for everyone else in the house

i am trying to run a business, trying to make a dollar here and there to help me pay me bills but i can't get the business to be so successful right now because if i'm crafting something to sell then i'm 'wasting time/goofing off/not doing anything important' and should be doing something REAL.

so excuse me if i'm not in a hurry to drop my life to put up some siding. it was started when i was in middle school, and should have been done years ago.

also... i'd like to add most of my time each day is WASTED by dealing with their bull shit.

it takes me an hour to cook 3 minute ramen because i have to clean the stove, counter, and pot i'm using. because my house looks like a dump. i'm jealous of sandford and son. at least they had plumbing.

i also have horrible asthma which takes its toll on me, and wears me out quickly. i dont have health insurance so i can't afford my $300 per month prescriptions. so lets pray i dont get sick.

wait... i spent last week BLOWING OFF school, and scouts to work outside and got a lung infection!
so i'm coughing, i'm tired, and i am BEHIND in everything.

oh, and lets not forget smoke and dust are the WORST triggers for asthma. along with cats.
cats dont bother me, in a clean house.

we havn't had a working vaccume cleaner in 9 years. the floor hasn't been vaccumed at all in a year, when i did it with a hand vac. the whole house. and i find it sad the not one person in this house besides me has a problem with is staying like this. plus my dad thinks its ok to smoke in the house if i'm not there. alot of times he forgets i'm here.

SOMEONE hire me, so i can get FAR away from this place. i'd rather work at Mc D's for the rest of my life paying rent at some shitty apartment than living here. too broke to move.

WHY WONT YOU HIRE ME?

Message me if you have a job offer...